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The thing that makes people ‘nutty,’ if you pardon the continued metaphor, is that they all-too-often try to get their Unmet Needs met in the wrong places, like the workplace. So let it be known that your place of work is NOT the place to get most of your Unmet Needs met. Instead …
Got an Unmet Need for RECOGNITION? Instead of trying to grandstand at work, why not spend some quality time with your kids instead?
Got an Unmet Need for APPRECIATION? Instead of trying to hog the credit at work, why not do some volunteering, or be particularly kind to a store clerk instead?
Got an Unmet Need for POWER AND CONTROL? Instead of trying to boss everyone around at work, why not pick up a challenging hobby that you can master, or do some exercising?
Got an Unmet Need TO BE RIGHT? Instead of making others wrong at work, why not do crossword puzzle, or buy your significant other a nice little gift?
Got an Unmet Need to be the CENTER OF ATTENTION? Instead of spending countless hours mindlessly chatting with coworkers, why not get a puppy or cat, or host a party instead?
The less you use your workplace as a place to get your Unmet Needs met, the easier it will be to do a better job – with less stress and strain. So the next time you feeling out-of-sorts, do these three steps:
(1) Figure out what Unmet Need of yours ISN’T being met.
(2) Name it.
(3) Go do something about it – outside of work, that is.
You’ll be glad you did.
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Source: Getting Unmet Needs Met, from November 2003 GottaGettaBLOG! Archives.
I’ve noticed this myself.
I think it happens when people don’t have anything to do outside of work.
When I have worked for someone other than myself, i hold to a strict policy of limited social contact with co-workers outside of the workplace.
Too much drama results from this. Not saying I’m unfriendly but many of the things you wrote about come into play.
I have enough to do with family, friends and other obligations to add another soap opera in my life.
The Power and Control part is especially scary. It ruins otherwise smooth running teams.
People that have nothing they can control outside of work are scary.
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